Why I Don’t Like Anti-Bullying Week

October marks National Bully Prevention Month.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I do believe “bullies” exist and they need to be stopped. But after several years at different schools with week long “Anti-Bullying” assemblies and activities, I’ve come to find it more hurtful than helpful.

The dictionary defines a bully as “one who is habitually cruel to others who are weaker”. Yes, I see this all the time at school sadly. We try our best to help those youngsters with their emotional needs and encourage them to do the right thing. But “Anti-Bullying Week” doesn’t always help.

“Anti-Bullying Week” tends to open up discussions on ways people bully. I think it is important to recognize if you are being bullied, but sometimes it gives students ideas on how to be a bully. They know it’s wrong, but now they have a plethora of examples of how to hurt others.

It also gives parents and students a very new vocabulary word, “bully“. And when something is new, people LOVE to use it over and over and over. I can’t tell you how many parents, during and after “Anti-Bullying Week” are speaking to me, calling the office, or talking to our principal about how their child is being bullied and so-n-so is a bully {we as a school and I as a teacher do take these threats very seriously, but it gives parents ammunition when they are calling to discuss an issue}. Sometimes, kids aren’t being bullied, sometimes kids aren’t bullies, sometimes they are just 5 year olds who don’t know how to interact with others or don’t know how to cope when they are emotional.

I write all this not to disrespect anyone who has been bullied, I have known some people who have come out of very serious bullying situations {even as an adult}. We do need to recognize and take action when these situations are brought to our attention. But I write this as a different perspective. Do we want to focus on the negatives of the world, giving parents more ammunition to label our students, not giving them a chance to grow and mature and try? Or do we want to give students ample examples of what humans should be like when interacting with others?

I can’t say all this with no alternative to the issue 😉

I am ALL FOR “Kindness Week”! A time where we don’t focus on the negatives of “what is a bully”, but the positives of how kindness can change the hardest of hearts and spread love. Sadly, most students in our classrooms don’t know what kindness looks like and sounds like. We are the best example of someone loving and kind. Loving doesn’t always look kind, but it’s constant.

I know one SIMPLE thing I do in my classroom EVERY morning is pull a task from the Kindness Jar {check it out in more detail HERE}. We take a minute to pick a card with a kindness task. We set it as our goal for the day {examples: Pick up a piece of trash today. Push in someone’s chair. Give someone a compliment.}. The next day, we reflect: did we do the task? How did it make us feel? etc. Then we pull one for that day. Simple and easy.

Here are two awesome programs I came across:

Let’s change the culture of our school from focused on the “don’t do’s” to focusing on the “do’s”.

Who’s with me?